This page is about finding help in breaking habits and making progress toward your personal goals. We all have different goals; it’s what makes us unique and interesting. Sometimes goals are for our weight, diet and physical activity and sometimes they are for daily habits we have or want to have such as saying ‘no’ more often, taking time for ourselves, meditating, being kinder, helping someone, controlling our temper, not letting ourselves be walked on, not taking things for granted and so many more ideas!

One thing I have experienced too many times for my comfort is negative hurtful comments made by people close to me and others who are merely acquaintances; and I’m sure I’m not alone in expressing this. I also realize that I probably have done the same thing – I’m not without fault. If I am at fault of saying something hurtful to someone I can assure them that it was not done on purpose and that I know for certain that it’s not a typical behavior on my part.

There are people who thrive on drawing the sword which is their tongue at any opportunity they find available. If you feel that you’re one of these folks and you want to stop, consider that stopping is a strength well worth the effort. Holding a sharp, hurtful statement in fact makes you an emotionally stronger person; replacing it with an encouraging or kind statement can make you feel a sense of freedom and inner happiness.

What about the people like me who are kind and compassionate but seem to somehow too often get caught off-guard by sharp-tongued people? How are we to handle it? From personal experience I can tell you that it’s not always easy. It plays over and over in your head, it sometimes causes you to lose sleep, it hurts deeply, it can cause you to feel like crumbs at the bottom of the bowl but eventually after processing and over-processing we are able to let it go. We accept it as this is just how that person is; short-tempered, moody, short tongued, thoughtless and careless. Their words don’t actually define us; we define ourselves. When you do define yourself, be sure to be kind, compassionate, caring, accepting, loving and giving – especially to those who deserve it.

When you’re in a situation where someone is verbally out of control, put yourself in control; don’t use sharp as a sword words – either hold it back or combat it with softness.